Ideal or Real

On a recent vacation with my family -who are probably the only people reading this, the topic of "what would your ideal day look like" came up as a genuine interest in what one of our member's vision for his life is. It got me thinking about how I would answer that and as I mused over the subject casually I noticed an exclamatory picture flashing in the background of my thoughts. It had to do with the ground rules for imagining one's future -does it have to be realistic? The very catagory that defeats many a great plan. I know that some people delete any sort of job from their ideal pic, prefering to have nothing interfere with their love of leisure, and that doesn't seem realistic, having no visible means of support, but it does provide the question "Is there no 'work' that could be as fulfilling as eating bon bons and watching movies"?

But for me the idea of realism actually introduced another revealing question, what am I likely to have considering my present circumstances, and what am I allowed to have? Now I know that the whole point of this exercise is to cast a line into the future upon which you can travel to get to your dreams and that by so doing you recognize the things that are snagging your ribbon of highway and decide what to do to get over them.

One thing at a time. I'm pretending that I don't know the point of this exercise, so here goes. My ideal day unfolds with ease. There is no need to rush, because there is time for everything, if not now, then tomorrow, or some other day that I can trust will come. This is so because I am always able to decide with complete clarity what is in my best interest, and I am grounded in the knowledge that there is enough for everybody including me, and that everybody else is totally capable of making their own best choices. I am not in charge of what is best for anyone but myself and I am genuinely interested in the prosperity of each and all. Here's where it gets tricky -what will I struggle with? How will I content myself with what I see before me in the choices of others? How will I separate my truth from the truth that others know without judgement? What part in their lives will I play? This brings me over a big chasm to the place I want to be (remember, I'm only spinning the thread at the moment, not concerning myself with road work). I see myself experiencing connection to those I love in the way I prefer most -the kind of thing that is like the mystery of sharing a joke. It is the thing that makes both people light up and delight in the total brilliance of the moment that is unexplainable but metaphysically tangable.

And then I eat lunch. And after lunch everything continues to be satisfying and ...what? Except for the lunch part I think I have just made my ideal day look like I have literally died and gone to heaven -I'm dead and life all makes perfect sense. I have no more struggles to muster up courage for, or to make joy all the richer.

Okay now in a few well chosen words what does my ideal life on EARTH look like? I get up every day eagerly anticipating all the great things there are to do in my life and I have someone who "gets me" right there in the same bed with me who is glad that life is exciting for me because it is for him too. And even though he has a job that he loves that is nothing I would have chosen for my own we like to make plans to do things together that we both can enjoy, things that we have made time for, things that we have money for, things we do because we know that when we're dead they just won't be possible, things that celebrate our being alive. Here, is WHERE we are. The moment, is WHAT is. And both of us are worthy of any wonderful thing we can imagine.

How shall I get to this ideal day? Wait? Believe? Visualize? Shop? Save? Get a hundred clients? Become a famous person? Plant myself in the right location? I can't do it by directing anyone elses life. Will it happen if I direct my own?

Why would I have to give up waking up excited to do all the great things there are out there to do just because I can't catch a glimpse of my reflection in someone else's eyes? I don't have to, but I do love it when that happens. Until then: tomorrow begins with a great breakfast at my coffee table with its cushion chairs; landscaping with the lawn mower; general lifescaping with enthusiasm, the old studio, the cob studio, my social life. If I really get into it what could be missing? Even so, I'll hold a space for miraclulous surprises, knowing there are enough for me and everybody else. That is, after all, really why we're alive, or so I think.